Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Random things I've learned

Canadians really do say "eh".

If the slutty girl at work thinks it's a bad idea, it probably is.

You can be alone and not be lonely.  You can also be desperately lonely when you're not alone.

If you let a dog sleep on your bed, it will soon want to sleep under your covers too.

I am, for some unknown reason, the one responsible for shaving my dog's male area.

Too many black Twizzlers will make your poop green. 

Never turn down the opportunity for a nap.

Men always think they are taller, thinner and sexier than they really are.  Women are the opposite.

No matter what you are good at, someone else will be better.  Deal with it.

Not even the most expensive perfume smells better than "clean".

No one can beat my sister at Zuma.  No one.

If your purse gets too messy, just buy a new one.  Problem solved.

I have too many purses. But the one I use is clean.

Mind-numbing, soul-sucking work is bearable when you work with fun people.


  1. Have you ever tried the perfume, 'clean'? It's by Calvin Klein. I don't remember which 'clean' scent I have. But I love it because it smells so....clean!

  2. Why is that about the Twizzlers? It's black for hells sake!

    And what is Zuma?

  3. I've given up on trying to understand why anyone owns a dog. I know people who have to do things for their dogs that I wouldn't even do for my human children. One friend has to squeeze his dog's anal glands monthly. And really? You have to shave your dog's nads? What would happen if it lived in the wild? Would its hairy crotchal region cause it to die? Because maybe that's natural selection at work. If you have to have your nads shaved or your anal glands squeezed to survive, you're probably supposed to just die so as not to pass those genetics on.

    Even if you have a low maintenance dog, you still have to pick up its crap.

    I don't get it.

  4. I like these. Especially the one about being lonely and the one about men being delusional. Both true, I so testify.

    Also, if your potential client is fureaking out about your retainer, it's a sure sign you don't want to work for him/her. High maintenance pain in the ass. Run like the wind.

  5. Oh. And not only is it impossible to please everyone, you don't want to.

  6. Tex, I'll have to check that out. I love clean scents!

    Fanny, I know,huh? And it's like NEON green.

    OMG Brandi,you made m spew. Technically I don't think my dog still has nads since he's been fixed. (Without asking the bishop.)

    CD, I had a boss that said 20% of your clients make 80% of the work. So get rid of that pain-in-the-ass 20%. And pleasing evryone just wears you out and drives you crazy.