My dog sleeps on my bedroom floor at night. She snores softly but I find it soothing. What I do not find soothing is when she gets a gas attack. Last night she was continually leaking noxious fumes that permeated my room and crept into my dreams. It reminded me of the saying, "Kids are like farts. You can really only tolerate your own." Okay, I stole that from Coffee Blogger who stole it from someone else. But it's still very true. I'm girding up my loins to face other people's screaming children and crying babies all day and into the night.
In the sprit of Christmas I bring you an original song by the musically gifted Coffee Blogger, used without her permission.
Oh Farting Dog (sung to the tune of Oh Christmas Tree)
Oh farting dog, oh farting dog
I know you have just dropped a log
I don't know why you spread your stench
In here with such malificence